Monday 25 February 2008

Still waiting....

I'm still waiting for the housing benefit claim form which was supposed to be sent out to me last Thursday. The longer it takes the more arrears show on my rent account.
The last few days have been spent doing very little except trying to sleep. I say trying because sleep is evading me..and it is very trying. I went for a short walk today, I haven't been out of the house since last Thursday. The background pain is still there..it's always there....I call it that because having had it for nearly 3 years I have just got used to it and have learnt to tolerate it to some degree. The other pains are the ones I have not learnt to tolerate. The pain and swelling in my hands, feet and knees..the migraine like eye and head pain. It's very draining and makes the brain fog worse than usual. Most days I can cope to some degree with the brain fog....forgetting what I've done..or just read....forgetting peoples names..even family member's. When the brain fog really sets in it's so hard to concentrate on anything. I forget what day it is..what time it is...it's like being temporarily being suspended in time, but knowing that time is still passing. The frustration gets to me then...not being able to think clearly or do anything....and inside my head everything is whirling.

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